Anybody who know’s Bella well won’t believe I’m writing this they’ll know her as a little ball of energy with that super cheeky smile, at home when she has her partner in crime (Maisy) she can be a little terror – up to all sorts.
Take her out of her comfort zone, without Maisy she turns into a different child, very shy, not all that engaging with other children and so so quiet. When Maisy started nursery in September I really noticed a difference in Bella, we went to play groups that she’d usually be happy to run off and play at the whole time but now she was stuck to my side or sat on my lap she didn’t want to play she just wanted me. I’d take her to soft play and the same would happen, she wanted me to take her down the slides where as with Maisy I’d struggle to get them to leave at all.
Then Bella started nursery 2 morning’s a week, it took her a while to settle. She didn’t cry when I dropped her off or anything she was just very quiet and didn’t talk much while she was there, she’d come out and tell me all about her day but stuck to her self and spent a lot of her time at the craft table – I guess that’s just what she enjoy’s. But I wanted them to see the side of her I see, the fun, outgoing, scared of nothing Bella who has a wild imagination and loves to get involved.
I was very shy as a child and think I missed out on a lot so I have been trying a few different things to help her build on her confidence and enjoy herself, after all I think that’s what all parent’s wan – just to see their child happy.
First tip is don’t stop doing thing’s, if they seem shy and a little clingy it doesn’t necessarily mean they aren’t still enjoying themselves they are still taking it all in and being around other children (for instance play group) is still good for building up their social skills.
Don’t get cross, It can be frustrating when you have just paid a boom for soft play and they don’t want to play choosing instead to be attached to your leg is a pain but stay calm and give them time.
Go with them, at playgroup get involved sit on the floor and play with them for a little bit, if other children come over involve them in what you’re playing too. Let your child see that it is fun and encourage their imagination to create new games, as they get really engrossed in something you can try to slowly move away not too far always be where they can easily see you.
With nursery we actually upped Bella’s hours when she turned three being there every morning I’ve seen a huge difference in her, she’s still quiet but she does talk, play with the other children and get involved she loves singing and going out for walks with them. We talk about her day at home a lot as well she loves to tell me all about where they’ve been and what they have done by showing my enthusiasm she’s excited for the next day. The other day she even asked if she could stay at nursery to eat her lunch!
Try new thing’s, the girls have recently started swimming lesson’s I was so proud that Bella got into he water without me she didn’t so much swim but she was having fun splashing about and within half an hour was jumping in off the side it was amazing to watch a few months before there is just no way she would have done that.
The most important tip would be not to push them too hard as it can scare them even more, gentle words of encouragement, plenty of praise and lots of time and they will get there.
What about you, is your child shy? Do you have any tips you would share?